My son turns 6 months old today. SIX MONTHS OLD. First of all, wow! Babies undergo so much transformation in just six short (and very long) months. Know who else has undergone a bunch of transformation in those six months? Me!
Life with a newborn feels like forever ago. Sleepless nights. Pumping every three hours. Anxiety and sadness through the roof.
Six months ago: I was bleary eyed and writing down how many ounces I pumped, how many ounces the baby drank and when, how many wet diapers he had, how many poopy diapers he had. Six months ago, I was scared my son would fall out of his swing or bouncer, scared to take him out of the house, scared to hurt him when I changed his diaper, scared to hurt him when I gave him a bath. I would wake up multiple times a night and place my hand on his chest to make sure he was still breathing. I would reach my arm over his bassinet to hold him and sometimes pull him into bed with me in the morning to cuddle and sleep.
Six months later: I am fairly well rested, some days better than others. I no longer nurse so pumping is old news. I sometimes change him and wonder when his last poop was. I put him in his swing while I take a shower. We go on walks and to museums and even Disneyland! I change his diaper in public places like a pro. I give him a bath every night and he kicks his legs and splashes the water all over the mirrors. I have lost 31 pounds of pregnancy weight with only 10 very stubborn pounds to go. We did the Happy Sleeper sleep training and after two nights, he was sleeping the whole night through in his own room. It's taken me a month and a half but I no longer stare at the baby monitor and I sleep through the night now too. I tried to bring him into bed with me once recently for a nap and he was not having it. I guess he really is an independent guy now!
He has gone from a little baby who moved like a very slow marionette to a chubby one who jumps up and down in his bouncer and rolls around like a madman when he's on the ground. We laugh together every day now. He happily enjoys eating food and expresses discontent if we are at the table eating without sharing. He gives me kisses on the cheek and reaches out to my husband and I to hold him. He communicates in babbles, blowing raspberries, happy shrieks, laughing, and grunts. He understand jokes. He pets the dogs. He is just already a super cool kid.
I didn't know I would love being a mom as much as I do. Experiencing his (and my own) transformation makes every day new and interesting. I have been scared to let him grow up but six months feels really monumental to me. I feel excited to see where he goes and who we both become. Time is not going to stop for me and pregnancy and motherhood have taught me that flexibility is key. I'm beyond happy to have this chubby little baby as my guide.